“It is far too late. Let’s ride. If we laugh any more, I’m going to have to run Giant Fuckin’ Crab Truckers, because that’s all we could handle.”

Three kids sent off to a suspiciously cultish camp for the weekend. Which is not a cult. Naturally. No really, it’s not. Stop asking. What’s a Yggmzyyk the non-committal? What’s a cult!?

Eli: Tristan. genuine hippy kid despite being 15, making him so nice it’s annoying. communes with nature (speaks to plants) and can induce “groovy visions.”
Sean: Holly / Sir Florentine. Freckled, hyper tomboy who enjoys punching and SPORTSBALL!! (“first rule of sportsball: always yell sportsball and then do something irrational”) Her monster is a giant chivalrous centaur knight
Jacob: Chris Bean “Cortez” / Huehuecoyotl. rich kid with an interest in wrestling and everyone else’s moms. Huehue is his mischievous ancient coyote spirit who talks like Hunter S. Thompson and can turn into a Randy Savage doll

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